Growing Up Under A Bounded Shadow


I grew up with a church in my backyard, I also grew up within a religious family a Christian family to be exact. I’ve been bumping my head trying to figure out what kind of Christians we were but I can’t remember. What did I practice when I was a kid? I never paid attention much after I realized what ‘real church’ was all about. Let me explain, when I was a kid I went to church and got put with the other little kids in a ‘Youth Christian’ type of group. The hour contained of us playing around and having fun and I thought to myself (To the best of my memory.) that I could actually be apart of this religion. We learned stuff as well but during that time Religion was not just talking about said religion but having fun doing so. 

As I got older though and the concept of enjoyment dwindled as the need to learn rose I became less and less interested with the religion I was told to believe in or go to hell. I tried very hard for my family to get on board with this whole belief, I did not want to disappoint any of them and felt that if I didn’t believe, I would.  I went to ‘Vacation Bible School’ to try and help me fuel some kind of fire less passion I should have for Christianity. 

During my teenage years I decided I didn’t care about Christianity at all and didn’t care what my family would think of it. The thought not is still nice the way I portrayed it was not at all. I acted out towards the church ridiculed it and the people who were apart of it, Even though most of them were nice people I was such a douche bag in my teenage years. Now though I have a better understanding I choose to be Agnostic though and appreciate every kind of idea.

This all fuels my confusion to why god is tied down by all these religions that say believe in this and go to heaven or go to hell. Why is the idea of him tied down to a belief? The two separate things are always put together when really someone could just believe in god and realize that can be enough.

Though that in another sense is a belief, it isn’t a fact and it can’t be fact. The world full of different fluid minds jumping at the idea of god. Ready with their rope and nail so that can trap the mighty giant and bind him to the ground. Though the giant/giants are to strong and they break their way free. Why can’t we all just accept the idea of god and not try to put him in our religious boxes?

Food for thought I suppose. 

3 thoughts on “Growing Up Under A Bounded Shadow

  1. I’ve always seen the various religions’ ways of describing God(s) as grasping at that which humans cannot understand. Whatever higher powers a person believes in, they know that they are so far out of their fallible, limited human understanding and perception as to be unreachable. So I think that it is human nature to try to anthropomorphize God so as to make him/her/it relatable, so that they can have some small facet of the divine which they can feel they have a personal relationship with. In so doing, though, there is the risk that we limit what we think God is, that we tie down what he/she/it is. We think we can understand the divine, when in reality it is and always will be a matter of total mystery and belief. Every person who considers themselves spiritual or religious does this, I think, whether or not they realize it. And certainly historical background and culture shape the ways in which a person conceives of deities and traps them into certain thought patterns about the divine.
    In my opinion, once a person declares that their beliefs alone are the only correct way to believe in the divine, that there is only one interpretation of religion and morality, they’ve left behind really seeking for the divine and for the good. I can’t stand it when religions say that they are the only true religion, announce who is saved and who is not, or proselytize and try to force people to convert to their faith.
    (As a side note, I also went to Vacation Bible School as a child and hated it.)

    • Vacation Bible school was basically just reading verses in the bible enough to be able to recite them at the end of it all. Where I went you had to rake up points before the end of the school week to go to the big party they have. It annoyed me and embarrassed me when I couldn’t go. But that’s beside the point, I agree with you completely that when religions say they are the only true ones its basically ignorance. Thank you for the comment and Seriously make more stuff so I can read it and comment.

      • Ours involved a lot of singing and dancing, and being a very introverted person I hated it. And I will write more soon! Alas, this week I realized that all of the projects that I had been putting off are due soon, so I might not get the chance to write until this weekend. But I will try!

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