Cold Hearted B$%&!


We have a day care run out of my home, it’s interesting I suppose. We have this two year old boy named Conner that goes to it and it’s like having a little brother without the full commitment. Like I’ll give you a high five but I’m not teaching you about sports, I’m no good at that. I don’t know much about sports, and I mean it’s hard to get into them when you watch them alone. Three sisters don’t give a damn about sports, and I don’t even know if Conner will like sports. He watches Monsters Inc a lot, and before that it was all about Shrek.

The whole time I’m watching it for the five billionth time I’m sitting there thinking, “Mike stop acting like you don’t like Boo, she adorable! Get your head out of your monster ass.”

Have you ever watched something so many times that you start talking to the movie as it goes on. I remember when Frozen came out and my youngest sister Zoe just fucking loved it. I watched it a lot during those times, especially when I was all set and ready for work but had some time to kill. I remember sitting there at times in the beginning of the movie just getting strangely angry at Elsa. It was always frustration as well, like I knew how to solve the problem but Elsa wouldn’t listen.

“LEARN TO LOVE YOU COLD HEARTED BITCH!!!!” In the beginning of the movie Elsa reminds me of my ex…yep…no chill for me today apparently.

If you ever had a sister who loved Dora the Explorer you would probably understand this more. I remember when my sister was little Dora was sometimes the only noise in the house. She enjoyed watching it with other people and I would sometimes join her to make her happy or I was simply bored. Dora would ask the stupidest questions that to a kid are all fun and games, but to an adult aggravate us.

Dora: Which way should I go left or right?

Sister: LEFT!!!!

Me: Well if you’d turn around and stop looking at me maybe you would know. The more I watch you the more I understand how you keep getting shit stolen from you by a GOD DAMN FOX!

Then my sister would be like “I think you need to leave.” and I nod my head and reply, “Yea I think you’re right.”

3 thoughts on “Cold Hearted B$%&!

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